Publishing for the Obsessive-Complusive Writer:

Ok, so last semester I was sitting next to my friend Tanya Campbell in Gospels class and this dude comes up and is all hitting on her and junk. I lean over to her and whisper, "He wants you....." She's like "Nah-uh...he's got a girl-friend..... doesn't he?" With the look of doom on her face, in what seems to be slowed time, I shake my head. "No....they broke up over the summer." The look of doom turned quickly to panic and terror. I take full advantage of this and I'm all acting like him, "Hey baby, what's up? You think maybe after this class you and I could....ya know.....like....go to Tim's?" I took full advanage of the situation and got inspiration for a short series... Here is a the first installment:

*clears throat*

A Bethany Relationship Soap Opera.....a progressive biography

(Narrator interjection: Due to a cheap budget and advancement in ideas, we have fired our editor and replaced him with a fancy name)

As the Timbit Rolls: A daytime-melodramatic-digitally-remastered-overly-hyped Soap Opera

(This episode of As The Timbit Rolls is taped before a live studio audience)

The Introduction to Boy:
Once upon a hill, there was place were people lived. Young people at that. On this hill there was a boy, who saw this girl and he thought to himself...."if only they would play a slow song....so I might take that girl in my arms...and slow dance with her like there is no tomorrow...." (Narrator interruption: and tanya says. . . cheesy!!!. . . and so the story continues. . . )
In his mind this girl was it...he had only known her a week....I'm sorry, a week and a day...he sat next her once in class....he gave her a ride down the hill in his car...he knew that deep down, oh yes, deep down this very girl was the one! He thought to himself, if only I could ask her out.....to Tim Hortons. Then we would go on walks together and I would talk to her on MSN....in the computer lab....while sitting next to her. And when that time is right.....when we've been going steady....to Tims...... I will ask her...that perfect girl.....would be my honey bunches of oats forever.....(now tanya gags. . . and the story continues. . . )
So they go on another walk and he picks her dandelions and tells her that he will show his love to her through tim bits. . . it was a wonderful relationship. He circles her picture in the Wedding Catalogue (also called the annual pictorial directory),, ,and he is really happy. . . but is she? (Due to Tanya's poor typing skills, we will leave this section unedited)

The Continued Saga......(The Story of a Girl):
He was a boy, she was a girl, can I make it any more obvious.....(shuts off the song Sk8er Boi ....) She heard about this school and was excited. She really didn't care what classes she had. All she knew is that she was there for her MRS. degree. School was all about finding that right boy....and there were a lot of them. With so many to choose from, she decides to go after them all....ok, maybe she wasn't that shallow, but it sure came across to be that way.
(Laughter is had by all who have read...and the story continues)
Oh, but sweet destiny! Fate's wheels turn and the girl spends more time with our main male character, thus fueling his endless thoughts of her. She finds that he is studying a different program than her, but it doesn't matter. They are happy.
The two have embarked on yet another voyage to Tim Horton's...the pillar of every relationship. It was blissfully wonderful, they talked and the boy shared his Timbits....and she knew that this must be true love! But as surely as dairy products give one gas, at that part of their outing, it happened. The boy said, "Darling, I think it's time that we take a step forward in our relationship....I think we should go to McDonalds." GASP!

(Narrator interjection: Could it be true!? Is she willing to make this step? What will it do to their relationship?! WHAT WILL THE CAMPUS THINK! Find out on the next semi-exciting and pathetically real episode of As The Timbit Rolls!!!!)